the FAN FICTION crossover you never knew you needed …
South Park : Red Alert
“The Chaos Protocol”
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The small mountain town of South Park finds itself at the center of a bizarre alternate timeline where Cartman accidentally triggers a rift in the space-time continuum using a stolen artifact from Area 51. This mishap fuses South Park's quirky reality with the alternate Cold War universe of Red Alert. Stalin, Einstein, and Tanya are now battling alongside South Park characters like Cartman, Stan, Kyle, and Kenny for control over this new hybrid world.
intro
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Base Building & Resource Gathering: Red Alert-style RTS mechanics with South Park flair. Build outposts in South Park and beyond, collect resources like "Cheesy Poofs" (energy) and "Beefcake Protein Bars" (currency).
Units:
Red Alert Characters: Tanya with over-the-top Hollywood hero antics, Tesla Troopers, Soviet Conscripts, and Allied Grizzly Tanks.
South Park Units:
Cartman as a megalomaniacal commander with "Special Forces" (kids armed with snowballs).
Kenny as a recurring unit that "dies" but respawns endlessly with random buffs.
Stan and Kyle leading "Freedom Pals" factions using unique powers.
Token bringing in airstrikes via his private jet.
Randy Marsh as a wildcard who spawns with random buffs based on his mood.
Special Abilities:
Cartman’s “Respect My Authority!” boosts morale but risks turning allies against him.
Einstein’s “Chronosphere” can teleport South Park characters into enemy bases for chaos.
Kenny’s “Immortal Sacrifice” can destroy units in his radius when he dies.
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The story unfolds across two intertwined campaigns:
Red Alert Perspective: Soviet and Allied commanders attempt to restore balance to their timeline while navigating the absurdity of South Park.
South Park Perspective: The kids and townsfolk try to “save the day” in their usual chaotic manner, culminating in an epic showdown against both factions.
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Factions:
Soviets: Heavy, durable units with Tesla technology.
Allied Forces: Fast, high-tech units and versatile air support.
South Park Residents: Erratic, unpredictable units with absurd powers (e.g., Mr. Garrison as a "tank" in his hand puppet persona).
Custom Maps: Locations like South Park Elementary, the Soviet Kremlin, Area 51, and Canada (a cartoonishly exaggerated version of the Red Alert map).
Humorous Modes:
Capture the Poof: A twist on capture the flag where the teams must retrieve Cheesy Poofs.
Build-a-Cartman: Collect pieces to assemble a massive Cartman Mech.
south park units
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"Respect My Authoritah!": Cartman demands respect, stunning enemy units in a wide radius. Friendly units get a temporary attack boost but may randomly attack each other due to confusion.
"Beefcake Barrage": Cartman calls in a barrage of vending machines raining down on enemy units.
"Snackrifice": Cartman eats a portion of your resources (Cheesy Poofs) but heals himself and nearby allies.
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"Kenny Dies": Kenny self-destructs, causing AoE damage. Respawns in 30 seconds with a random bonus (e.g., invisibility, fire resistance).
"Rats Revenge": Upon death, Kenny summons a horde of rats to overwhelm enemy infantry.
"Sh!tty Little Shield": Deploys a broken shield (literal garbage) that absorbs minimal damage but looks hilarious.
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"I’m Lorde!": Randy dons his Lorde persona, singing to demoralize enemy troops and lower their accuracy.
"This is America!": Randy downs a beverage, gains a huge attack bonus but randomly wanders around for 15 seconds.
"Fight Me, Bro!": Taunts enemies into targeting him exclusively while buffing his defense.
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"Mr. Hat’s Tantrum": Summons Mr. Hat, who acts as a kamikaze unit that explodes in enemy lines.
"Build the Wall": Creates an impassable barrier for 30 seconds, but enemies hear Mr. Garrison yelling political nonsense.
red alert units
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"Bang Bang!": Tanya rapidly destroys all infantry in a cone in front of her, leaving cartoonish explosion effects.
"Blow it Up, Baby!": Destroys a single building in one hit with an exaggerated Hollywood-style explosion.
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"Chrono Confusion": Teleports an enemy unit randomly across the map.
"Tesla Tango": Creates a localized EMP that disables vehicles but causes everyone to do a ridiculous dance.
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"Zap Happy": Fires a supercharged Tesla coil that bounces between enemy units, leaving a burnt "fried chicken" visual effect.
"Juiced Up": Overcharges nearby buildings for faster production but risks short-circuiting them (causes random debuffs).
building
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Cartman Command Center: Produces Cartman-related units and abilities. Looks like Cartman’s house but with a huge satellite dish and random junk in the yard.
Cheesy Poof Factory: Resource-generation building; when upgraded, it releases toxic cheese gas to slow down enemies nearby.
Kenny's Shack of Wonders: Produces Kenny units and has a respawn beacon that revives fallen heroes faster.
Randy’s Field Lab: Builds wild-card units like Randy and experiments for random buffs.
Token's Tech Tower: High-tech research building for advanced weapons and upgrades, complete with lasers and a hot tub.
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Soviet War Factory: Produces heavy tanks and Soviet vehicles. Looks intimidating but sometimes malfunctions comically (e.g., smoke, random alarms).
Allied Barracks: Standard infantry production but with a propaganda screen constantly showing Tanya flexing.
Tesla Reactor: Powers your base and electrocutes nearby enemy infantry when destroyed.
Chrono Lab: Builds teleportation units and upgrades Einstein-related abilities.
Kremlin Command Center: The nerve center for Soviet leadership, featuring dramatic statues of Stalin (or a confused South Park resident pretending to be him).
vehicles
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Timmy’s Turbo Wheelchair: Timmy rides a motorized wheelchair armed with fireworks and snowball launchers. His battle cry is, of course, "TIMMY!"
School Bus of Destruction: An old South Park school bus outfitted with flamethrowers and bumper spikes.
Mr. Hankey Tank: A poop-shaped tank that fires explosive sludge bombs. Provides hilarious morale boosts for nearby troops.
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Grizzly Tanks: Classic Allied tanks with a polished, cartoonish makeover to match South Park's aesthetic.
Tesla Tank: Fires electric beams that short out South Park vehicles, often accompanied by over-the-top sound effects like “Zap-a-dee-zap!”
Kirov Blimp: A massive flying zeppelin that drops bombs shaped like South Park characters’ heads.
Expansion Pack Concept:
South Park : Red Alert
“The Multiverse OffensivE”
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This expansion takes the absurdity up a notch by introducing new characters, factions, and maps that further blend the worlds of South Park and Red Alert, while also introducing a multiverse twist. This pack focuses on bringing fresh gameplay elements, more outrageous humor, and even more strategic chaos.
New Factions and Characters
The Coon and Friends (Multiverse Heroes)
A superhero faction led by The Coon (Cartman) Donning a disguise modeled after a raccoon, with characters from South Park’s superhero alter egos. Their abilities focus on mischief, sabotage, and area-control tactics.
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"Coon Strike": Summons a swarm of raccoons to overwhelm enemy infantry.
"Coon Patrol": Deploys a group of stealthy Coon clones to sabotage enemy buildings.
"Mwahaha Manipulation": Temporarily converts enemy units to fight for him.
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"Immortal Hero": Kenny respawns instantly with full health upon death.
"Dark Veil": Creates an area of fog that hides friendly units and buildings.
"Mysterious Sacrifice": Deals massive damage to enemies at the cost of Kenny's life (he respawns).
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"Power Drill Barrage": Drills through a line of enemies for heavy damage.
"Utility Wall": Builds temporary barricades to slow enemy advances.
"Supercharged Saw": Deals bonus damage to enemy vehicles.
The Time-Traveled Canadians (Canada's Army)
Canada becomes a major force in the expansion after discovering advanced time-travel technology in their maple syrup reserves. Canadian units are cartoonishly polite but deadly, with heavy use of puns and absurd weaponry.
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"Explosive Fart Bomb": Area-of-effect damage and confusion for enemies.
"Double Trouble": A summonable duo that delivers non-stop banter while dealing ranged damage.
"Fart Shield": Creates a gas cloud that blocks enemy projectiles.
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"Maple Strike": Summons Canadian geese to attack enemy units.
"Oh, Sorry!": Lures enemies into a trap with polite banter before unleashing an ambush.
"Timberline Stampede": Calls in a charge of moose, dealing trampling damage.
new maps
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Fight in the infamous Mexican restaurant from South Park. Players can hide units in the cliff divers' pool for protection or use the animatronic band as a distraction.
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A bizarre Soviet amusement park featuring functioning rides that act as environmental hazards. Roller coasters can derail and damage units, while bumper cars can knock infantry around.
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A snowy, mountainous map with roaming moose that randomly attack units. Maple syrup "hot spots" provide bonus resources when captured.
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A surreal map set inside Cartman’s imagination, where random events like “Mom’s Yelling” or “Snack Attacks” affect gameplay. Units may randomly gain buffs or debuffs depending on Cartman’s “mood.”
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A multiverse battleground with shifting terrain and portals that teleport units across the map. Beware: units sent through portals may come back as different versions of themselves!
